I have not always liked my sister, in fact there were
stretches that lasted several years where I was pretty convinced she was an
agent sent by Satan to ruin my life. No,
really—if she wasn’t plotting some evil strategy to get me grounded she was
stealing my stuff. I silently and
sometimes not so silently wondered to myself how of all the sisters in the
world did I get stuck with her…she and I are nothing alike and her only real
past time is annoying me.
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| We were stone cold sober--I don't what got in to us. |
Luckily as time wore on and we got older, Dawn became a
bearable human being. In fact, I actually started to like her. I found myself
spending time with her even when I had other things to do. And then one day, I
realized—oh shit! Dawn is not only my sister…she might be my best friend. Dawn grew-up with me so she understood my
brand of crazy, when talking with her I never have to start any conversations
with do you remember when—because of course she does…but it is so much more
than that.
Dawn helped me keep me sanity during Brit’s illness. When
Dawn became my only sister, in this world, again; she understood the complexity
of my feelings and grief like no one else. Sometimes, we would call each other
and just sit in silence together on the phone—or cry—words weren’t necessary.
She understood. Dawn is my strength, my
rock, and my inspiration.
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| The Wielgus Sisters |
Dawn is Wonder Woman.
She is an amazing mom to three pretty awesome kids (who might just have
the best aunt in the entire world). Dawn is wicked smart, she has an unmatched
work ethic, and a kind, giving heart. I
do not know anyone who can not only move mountains on a daily basis but do so
with dignity, grace, and a smile. She has a peaceful calm about her until she
is pissed off and then she channels her inner mobster (we are still looking for
the bodies). And just to give you some examples of Dawn’s awesomeness: she
co-founded a family business with her husband the Chiropractor—Dawn handled ALL the business side stuff from
becoming in-network with insurance companies to developing and implementing a
marketing strategy to getting their practice online with electronic medical
records—oh yeah did I forget to mention she went to school fulltime while doing
this; gave birth to three children, and frequently volunteered at community
events. WONDER WOMAN!
When I called Dawn to tell her that Caroline had been
diagnosed with Autism—she immediately found a silver lining—“You (and by you, I
mean you and me) will never have to wait at Disney again.” Yes, two months
later, Disney changed their policy. But
the point is, in that moment when I didn’t know what I was feeling other than
everything—Dawn gave me a reason to laugh.
And on the numerous nights, when I called her crying because life was
stressing me out—Dawn didn’t tell me it will get better or it is not so bad—she
said “You are right this sucks and I am so sorry this is what your life looks
like right now.” It was what I needed to hear.
A week before Caroline’s first Christmas, Dawn drove 70
miles to babysit my ladies so John and I could go Christmas shopping. This is
when Caroline who had an NG tube (that was scary to many people) and when she
was crying for 16 to 18 hours a day and projectile vomiting multiple times
daily. While watching both Caroline and
Vivian, Dawn also managed to clean and decorate my house (including putting up
a Christmas tree). I almost cried when I walked in…Dawn said I wished I could
have done more.
One last reason Dawn is special—she has graciously shared
her birthday with none other than Vivian for the last five years. The day after Vivian was born Dawn came to
visit me in the hospital. She walked into my room and said “Give me my niece.”
I promptly handed Vivian over thinking nothing of it. No sooner than Dawn had Vivian in her arms
than she said “Now, don’t freak out everyone will be fine.” She went on to tell
me that my husband had a blowout tire on the highway during the summer in
Arizona. And that my dad had cut off his
finger while trying to finish Vivian’s crib.
She assured me everyone will be fine and not to worry—I should just
enjoy the peace and quiet in the hospital—oh and I should not disturb her visit
with her niece. Maybe Vivian learned her cool and demanding manner from her
birthday buddy.
Since the moment that Dawn yanked Vivian from my arms so she
could barrage me with bad news and ensure the safety of her niece I have been
fortunate enough to watch with wonder as Vivian has grown in a force to be
reckoned with. At the tender age of 5,
this little lady has mastered many skills that will take her far in life.
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| Vivian dancing |
Just the other day, she demonstrated her ability to be
passive aggressive. “Mommy, I am
practicing dancing so that when I start going to the dance class you said you
would sign me up for I will be ready.
Remind me again, why didn’t I get to dance while we lived in
Texas?” Yes, she might be getting dance
lessons for her birthday.
Vivian also understands that sometimes, a girl just needs
ice cream for dinner. And while she
enjoys actually eating the ice cream, she takes joy in the fact that she is
doing something whimsical. During these
ice cream meals, the joy of the moment often overtakes her and she generously
shares her ice cream with her seester.
She understands life is not a race. “Mommy it is not a race.
Well, maybe it is but whoever finishes second wins.” In other words, she sets herself of success
at every possible opportunity and understands how to manage expectations.
Vivian has learned the great joy that comes from teaching
someone a new skill. Vivian comes from a
long line of teachers on her father’s side and has already expressed an
interest in being a teacher when she grows up.
She has a teacher voice and since she was 16 months old she could hold a
book so as the ‘entire class’ could see the pictures. And she takes great pride in teaching or
helping her ‘sweetie’ (aka Caroline) master new skills. “Okay, Sweetie, criss-cross applesauce, now
touch touch the green slipper.”
Vivian is amazing for some many reasons but perhaps because
of the relationship I have with my sister; I am most proud of the amazing big
sister she is. Vivian is kind,
thoughtful, and patient (as is possible for a 5 year old). She is passionate, articulate, argumentative,
and bossy all the makings necessary to develop into a strong-willed, confident
woman.
I am thankful and lucky to have both Dawn and Vivian in my
life. Both of these lovely ladies make
me a better person, challenge me, and remind me that I am never alone in this
world.
Happy Birthday Dawn and Vivian. Thank you for all you are
and all you are to me. I hope you both
have a wonderful day.
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